It's not what I want...

We tell lies when we can't hide our secrets...
I don't care if it's immoral; it's not illegal, is it?
I lie to protect myself, to protect you.
I lie because if I tell the truth, others hurt. Others die inside.
I know it's wrong, I know it's bad.
I'm a bad friend, a bad person. But there's more at stake here.
I don't look for secrets when I can't believe my lies.
I make my lies when I just can't believe the truth
It's not what I want, but it's how I need it to be.
The way it has to be.
My world is not reality; the truth is what I make it.